And so, the TOEFL result is out! I got 77. My target was 80. It was a little bit disappointed but luckily I pass the requirement of the school. I got everything I need to apply for the visa and I hope everything will go smooth. The interview day will be the day after John leaves. It's Valentine's day today, I got nothing. not even a flower. that disappointed. I am truly surprise now. LOL. No, I'm not blaming him for not getting me anything, cause I understand we just got back from our own hometown and there's no time for it. But still, deep down in my heart, I really thought you will have a surprise for me. This is probably the last Valentine's we can celebrate together not through Skype or Whatsapp. 

The 3rd Day

Happy Chinese New Year!  The first day of our Chinese New Year.  It was really a good day! How good? LOL pictures will shows. Mom went crazy today cause she shop like no tomorrow. You think I get something?  Nope! All I got are free membership and news letter. LOL. In the mean time, I brought her a Dior glasses. Today will be our last day to be here. Tomorrow 1140am flight back to KL. Then we are going back to Muar to visit grandma! I miss them freaking much.

After the new year trip and holiday I will be super busy cause of buying furniture for the new house. I hope do hope really hope that the visa thing will go really smooth.

The Second Day

Well we went to Eda World today. That is an outlet for all these international brand. Surprisingly mom got me a burberry classic coat. I was surprised and speechless cause it is expensive and she always be the one who not agree with me using branded stuff. LOL

Then,  visit grandma at her house. It was really a good time. Talking and hanging out with the family. Had our dinner afterwards and all those dishes are heavenly. Haha.

I still remember the first time we had our CNY at Taiwan. So, this hotel and place and moment reminds me of u very very much. I miss u.

The First Day In Taiwan For CNY 2013

Didn't took any photo on phone or iPad while I'm on the plane. But apparently, today is the first time I got air sick in my life. Flying with two little devils are still ok, I got lucky cause they are seated together in a roll with their parents.

Well, last night was a little bit cray cray cause Johnny was brought back by John's neighbor after the annual dinner. We got home around 1 and I have to do Johnny's laundry from his NS in order to let him take back when we back from Taiwan. I slept at 4 in the morning and woke up at 6 to get to the airport.

I miss John a lot cause this hotel reminds me of him. Haha. We have special memory here. Haha. That's it for today! Happy Chinese New Year!

A little crazy day

Today was really a crazy day. Went out from day to night and yet, there is stuff I still haven't complete. My visa fee is still pending due to lack of time. So, I'm going to do it again tomorrow. Dang. Tomorrow morning, I'm going to do grocery shopping at 930am. LOL. Because I want to go to John's place as early as possible.

As you can see, today he is the technician. LOL I love him still. So sexy.

Work out with honeyyyy

Done quite a lot of things today. But some of it just did half cause of some careless mistake. Woke up early today and went to John's place. We went to collect my transcript and went to One Utama to take my visa's photo. Careless me, after walking around then straight away went back without collecting the photos. Then, I was suppose to pay my visa fee today but I did not read the instruction, apparently standard charter bank changed the rule for people who want to pay for the US visa fee. You have to bring the confirmation letter along with your passport. Dang! Again, wasted my time and have to go again the next day. So, today what we did was just collecting transcripts from 2 colleges. Tomorrow we have to go to SC bank again to pay for the fee along with the required documents. Then collect the photos and send out the transcript. Gosh! Still before meeting up with John, I have tons of stuff to do. Send some people to the doctor, pass some CNY gift to mom's friend, send them home, go to the new unit to drop off cheque, go to the management to check out my parcel which sent from FIDM!!!!!! I totally missed it!! 

We went home since there's nothing we can do. Play with the gadgets for awhile while John went installing all the CNY decoration lighting for his mom. He is the technician, barista, car washer, plumber, gardener and personal trainer at home. He is my boyfriend. LOL. He do everything when he got home. So, look at his working out face. He drag me to work out together with him. I did, now my butt pain, is not because I work out very hard, it's just the bicycle's seat was hard.

This is what I saw on Facebook and what it says are pretty accurate. Maybe following it will makes the lose weight progress smoother. LOL. 

03022012

Finally the TOEFL disaster is over. I don't know how much I will score but hopefully not too bad. Will check about it 10 days later. Seems like everything is going very smooth but my heart feels uncertainty. It's like a bad memory. I've been rejected twice for my application of the student visa to USA. This really stressed me out and I don't want this to happen again. Seriously, I want to leave and have a good time being at USA. I feel like, I really need to go out and see the world. Yes, there are people I feel hard to leave but people comes and goes isn't it? People who stay for you and people who left. It takes time to figure out things that I can't really see through now. There are problems in my life and I couldn't solve it now. I thought of the best way, but yet it seems like it's getting worst. It's just no one wants to point that out yet. I believe, it will be pointed out soon. Hopefully it's not a bad ending. 

Let's say, if my Visa is approve, I will be leaving on mid March. That soon. I know. But, I can't wait for it. Since 2007, I wanted to go there to study. How many years already? 6 years. If I really got the visa, I will be super duper happy and finally follow my dream. No matter what, I'm gonna be there and stay there unless there are people that makes me feel that it's worth it to leave USA. If, mom gets to reschedule the time with the fortune teller at Hsinchu, I might get to go and maybe see him the last time. Just maybe. I pray so hard for the visa, prepared everything for the interview. After paying the fee, I'm going to schedule the time for interview. Wish me luck!!!!!

02022013

想念那时的我们 聊着无聊的东西也觉得有趣
时间长了 是该这样的 只是这样的我们似乎不怎么快乐
我们很好 只是懒惰了 不耐烦了 没有新鲜感了
我有些厌倦
可是想到那时的我们 想到你 我很不舍
你是那么的优秀 那么的懂我
而我却因为他人的三言两语动摇了我对你的爱
冷静沉思了一段时间
其实我还是深爱着你 只是我们都习惯了
以为真的可以头也不回的离开
说穿了 那也只是以为
因为 不说话的一整天已经是折磨
那一整天 无精打采 行尸走肉 哭哭啼啼
真的很痛苦
赌气也气自己
其实 只是过渡期
过了就好了
坚持

01022013

如果你知道我们的约定对我来说有多重要 你就知道此刻我的心情是如何
我以为你会等 可是你没有
后来 我也不说什么了 妥协了 遗憾的是那不会是我们的第一次
你自己亲口答应说的第一次 就这样泡汤
其实也不重要了 好像我小题大作
希望以后 彼此间的约定会被重视 至少不要再承诺了
因为现在除了失望 也不再期待了

不是你的错 是时间的错 时机不对
你是对的人 只是在错的时间遇到你 我还是很珍惜你
仿佛明白妈妈在我还不懂事的时候告诉我她的心已经死了的感觉 那时我问为什么她不再在乎 她就是这样回答
很可惜 可是妈妈的不可惜
可惜的是我们的感情 现在的我们好像很脆弱
不堪一击 很怕在某一天我们就结束了
我们还有的约定都还没实践
一起去 17 Mile Drive看日出日落
去迪斯尼乐园看烟花
去Universal Studio
去旅行 很多很多地方
当初不知道原来这些承诺真的要用那么多时间来实现
每次我说以后 你的反应我都看在眼里
很多的顾虑让你退缩
每次我警惕自己不要再对你说以后了
每次看到你的反应 除了失望 也是心疼
心疼你的顾虑
或者离开这里去美国真的是一件好事
或者几年后 我们会更懂怎样相处
或者几年后 我们会更快乐
你说我们不会分开 我相信
只是现在的我们还不知道要用什么方式相处
我相信 再过几年我们会用正确的方式相处
现在的我们在尝试 在适应
是啊 2年了 我们还在向彼此学习
现在的我 期待几年后的我们 真的希望到时候不再是失望

人和人之間，相處不容易，夫妻也一樣。

這麼多年來，她和他都不知爭執了幾回。

而且，比爭執更可怕的，是淡然。

不是不愛，只是愈來愈感受不到愛的熱度和強度而已。

愛不是不在，只是倆人之間，習慣比愛多了些而已。

愛也沒有消失，只是她和他都明白，

相處比相愛更重要而已。

31012013

Our secret words